I'm back!!

So,  I have been thinking a lot about my life and about all of the progress I have made in the last few years.  I decided that it would be nice to start writing in this blog again.  It gives me a forum to express what I am going through.  As I prepared to start writing again, I decided to read my previous posts and I have to say, I was overwhelmed by my emotions.  The amount of love I received from so many people was amazing.  I felt it then but especially feel it now.  It reaffirmed for me why restarting the blog was a great idea!!

For those who dont know, I started blogging three years ago when I went to a weight loss center in North Carolina.  I felt it was a great way to connect with my loved ones back at home and to keep everyone abreast of my progress.  When I was in the center, it was easy to blog.  I was in a positive place and excited about my future.  When I got home after 4 weeks, the real world hit me like a ton of bricks and I slowly gave up on the blogging, as I was slowly giving up on myself.  My aunt continously asked me to restart writing and I obliged her by writing an entry in November but that was a very sad post.  I was feeling like a huge disappointment- I disappointed myself, my job, my friends and my family...or so I thought...I didnt give the blog another thought over the last few years until now.

Last year was an interesting year for me.  I moved in with my honey's parents and began OVERINDULGING in all my favorite foods.  I was in a job I hated and in a new environment.  I didnt realize it but I was on a downward spiral.  Slowly, I started putting on weight but denied it to myself.  I thought, oh its just a few pounds and I could lose it easily.  This frame of mind continued until January, when we went out to celebrate Elio's birthday.  NOTHING fit!!! I was soooo frustrated and soooo angry with myself!! I had to buy an outfit that was 1 size bigger than my largest size.  I knew I had to do something but was very reluctant.  Then I saw some pictures from that night on FB and I wanted to cry.  My face was HUGE!!

Over the next few weeks, I decided to join Weight Watchers because it was a plan that had always worked for me.  The day I had to weigh in, I did so with a heavy heart.  I really didnt want to face reality.  When my lead, Susan, wrote down my weight, my heart DROPPED.  I had put on over 30 lbs and was 23 lbs heavier than my previous high!! How did I let this happen??  My lead told me something that really started me on my new weight loss journey.  She said, "You dont have to be perfect.  Just start by tracking everything you eat, even if you dont follow the program."  Well, that first line stuck with me.  I dont have to be perfect, I just have to do my best and take an active interest in my health and well being. 

That was 15 weeks ago and I am soo proud to say I have lost 45 lbs!!  This is the first time I can say that I am proud of myself.  I am working hard and making sure to stay on track.  In the first month or so, I took it meal by meal because if not, I would get overwhelmed.  I now take it day by day! For the first time, I have been on track for over 3 months and have not "slipped" at all.  I know there may come a time where I slip and I will not beat myself up over it.  I am human and dont have to be perfect. 

This was a long post but I plan to write more often!!  I hope you enjoyed reading.  If you feel like sharing any thoughts, encouragement or positive energy, please leave a comment.

As always, thanks for reading and take care!! :-)